I've struggled to write this blog for almost a month now. I didn't want it to seem like a humble-brag. After thinking about it, this blog will become boastful, but not about myself. I will be bragging about God. Without Him, I am an extremely selfish person. Before I rededicated my life to Christ, I always wanted to know 'What's in it for me?' I was this way with my friends, clients, neighbors, and even my family. I had to get something in return before I would help. A quid pro quo if you will. I still struggle with this, especially, in my business.
However, I am learning to love others as myself with the help of the Holy Spirit. I am developing a servants heart. I also use a phrase I heard: Don't think, 'What Would Jesus Do (WWJD)?'; think, 'what would I do if it were Jesus?' If Jesus needed a jump-start, what would I do? If Jesus needed me to stay an extra 30 minutes at work, what would I do?)
In September 2012, our pastor taught on stewardship. The basic concept is that everything we have has been given to us by God and we should return a portion of the resources back to God. This can apply to money, time, talents, etc. At that time, I was absolutely convicted that I needed to volunteer at the church. Of course, I didn't make it that easy. There were a list of excuses and most of them seemed legitimate (new to the church, wasn't sure where to serve, no time, didn't want to be put in a ministry that I wasn't good at, and so on). Looking back, it was really a lack of faith and my own insecurities that held me back. This is the point of this entire post. If you get nothing else, know that we all have insecurities, but God designed you for a purpose (Jeremiah 1:5).
Fast Forward to November 2012 and I still hadn't stepped out in faith. I was reading "The Purpose Driven Life" by Rick Warren and purpose #4 in his book is "You were Shaped for Serving God." After that chapter, I sent a message to our church leaders asking them to use me. Of course, Satan was using my insecurities and turning them in to irrational fears as I was typing and I was thinking that I'm not needed or not talented enough, but I hit send and the message was gone. In less than an hour, I heard back from one of the leaders and a weight was lifted off my shoulders.
Before I met with LCC's Director of Connections, Bob Drew, (he helps people find serving opportunities and small groups), I prayed and spent time with God to give me direction. The direction he gave me was to steward my time. There are 168 hours in a week. If I gave 10% of my time to God, it would be roughly 17 hours per week. Generously, I would spend an hour each morning praying, meditating, and reading the Bible. Plus, an hour and half on both Sunday and Wednesday at church or small groups. That's only 10 hours per week or 6% dedicated to God.
Loaded only with the conviction that I wanted to spend more time with God, I had my first meeting with Bob and had no idea what ministry I wanted to serve in or what was available. I took a spiritual gifts test (highly recommended) and we had a conversation about my background, talents, and interests. The next week we met again and I accepted two positions at the church. The first was on Sundays helping people "connect" through small groups, ministry opportunities, and events at LCC. This one came naturally to me because my career is customer service based and I'm talking to people all day long. The second position was to help maintain the websites of LCC throughout the week. Not to diminish the talents or role that God gave me to work at Connection Central on Sundays, but this Web Admin position was special to me. A lot of people don't know that I went to Devry University (used to be called Devry Institute of Technology when I went there). My major was Computer Information Systems (mostly programming and other nerdy computer things). I've always been kind of ashamed of going there. It was a lot of money and not a prestigious school. I ended up becoming an insurance agent. I looked back and thought that I should have went to a public school for business.
I am just so thankful that God has purpose my life. He designed only me this way! Even if I got away from His plan in my 20s, He can take my background and use it for His purpose! There are so many other ways God has blessed me since I've started serving, but I don't want to go too long and make this unreadable, so I'll just list a few: I've been able to expand my staff at work which gives me more time, made new friends at church within my different ministry teams, the pride of seeing others connect or seeing new people come to LCC because of Facebook or the website, and most important spending time with God.
I pray that my testimony will help you to step out in faith and serve God in the way that he designed you. There can be good and bad things from your past (addiction, broken home, education, career, etc.) and God can use all those things for His purpose.
"Not so with you. Instead, whoever wants to become great among you must be your servant, and whoever wants to be first must be your slave— just as the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many.”
Matthew 20:26-28
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